


Nightingale

by Shadowbob



Category: DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: Character Death, Clear's Bad End AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2016-06-26
Packaged: 2018-06-07 02:44:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6782182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowbob/pseuds/Shadowbob
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A different perspective of Clear's bad ending.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a year since I've written anything so I'm a little rusty and insanely nervous about posting this. I will add tags as I go.

A bright light formed above the fog and a sound, a song, could be heard just beyond the surface. Sei allowed the soothing voice to carry him up into the light. He pushed passed heavy, crusty eyelids into consciousness. Blinking rapidly, he fought to adjust his eyes to the light above his bed.

The antiseptic plastic pumping air into his lungs made it impossible for him to look around the white, sterile room. He wanted to find the source of the sound that woke him from his drugged sleep. He swore it sounded like someone singing. There was a beep to the side of his bed and out of the corner of his eye he watched a machine pump fluid through a tube in his arm. In a matter of seconds, the world became fuzzy again and he slipped into another muddy sleep.

This time when Sei opened his eyes, he was back in his room. He had been disconnected from all but one machine. There were no more tubes in his arms or down his throat. He looked around his room trying to imagine how long he had been gone for this time. There's no knowing. He remembered when he used to be grateful to have survived Toue's experiments, now he just wondered where the strength to keep waking came from. Too weak to do much else, Sei stared at the ceiling trying to recall the voice he heard while in the fog.

A few or more moments pass and the ceiling started to become blurry, almost as if it didn't like being stared at. A small knock on the door pulled his attention away. Without waiting for a reply, an _a_ unit carrying a tray entered the room. He didn't seem as hostile as some of the others, though Sei couldn't tell why exactly. He quietly walked around the bed to the machine and studied the monitor. Then he placed the tray on the bed, removing a glass of water from it and setting it on a side table. He lifted Sei's arm with a look that almost seemed like pity and placed a rubber tie around it. Once a vein became visible, he jabbed a needle in it, making Sei jump.

The _a_ unit mumbled an unconvincing apology under his breath, making Sei turn his head and really look at him. Was that the voice from earlier? He didn't have any real strength with which to speak but he had to find a way to ask. As the _a_ unit gathered up everything and turned to leave, Sei put all that he had into projecting his voice using his power. "Wait please." To his surprise, the _a_ unit froze with his hand on the doorknob. For a second, Sei believed he actually held sway over him but he knew Toue had altered everything and everyone so that they were immune to him. "I have to know, was it you who was singing earlier?"

The _a_ unit's hand fell to his side and a long silence stretched between them. "Don't do that again." He turned to glare at Sei just to get his point across. "I will be back shortly to see that you eat." And then he was gone and Sei was alone with the ceiling again.

His room used to be filled with stuffed animals and colors and a carpet, even a small bookshelf in the corner. Fairytales. One day he woke up and it was all gone. Maybe this was a different room. He would never be allowed to know. But at one point, there were plenty of things to look at. He would count the stuffed animals over and over again. Organize and reorganize the books. Invent new names for the many colors everywhere. Now it was just white. White and empty.

Before his vision could get blurry again, Sei noticed his mouth was so dry his lips were sticking to his teeth. He rolled his head to the side and stared at the glass of water. Even if he could move, the thought of putting anything in to his stomach was nauseating. Still, he balled his hands into tight fists and released them over and over in an attempt to regain some strength. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't. He ran his tongue across his teeth to wet them as he extended his efforts to wiggling his arms.

Just as he was getting enough strength back to reach for the glass, the door opened. It was two _a_ units this time. One came over and lifted Sei out of his bed and stood off to the side with him. The other stripped the bed of it's sheets and replaced them with fresh ones. Sei was then dropped back on to the bed like he had been disgusting to touch and the two _a_ units left without a word. They weren't really supposed to handle him so roughly. The fact that they did must mean he has little value left to Toue. He had always been told he wouldn't be useful forever. And now the water was too far away to bother.

He took to watching droplets of water race down the glass. It was so entrancing, he almost missed the knock on the door. It had to be the _a_ unit from earlier, no one else knocked. Once again he walked in without waiting for a response. He pulled Sei up into a sitting position and placed a tray in his lap with a bowl of the usual vitamin slop. Instead of leaving, the _a_ unit grabbed a chair from just outside the door and sat down next to the bed. "Eat." He demanded, looking passed Sei to the untouched glass of water. Sei stared at him in confusion until he lowered his face in an almost nervous manner. "What is it?"

"I'm sorry, no one usually sits with me." Sei slowly reached for a spoon with a shaky hand and slipped it into the gray-ish oatmeal imitation. The _a_ unit watched it sink into the bowl, grateful eating wasn't a necessity. "I have been told to see that you eat." Sei smiled softly. "I find it odd that Toue would care so suddenly." The _a_ unit met his gaze for just a second before looking away. "It's important for you to eat." His eyes fell to a spot on the floor and he decided to find it interesting for as long as possible. Sei let out a small laugh that sounded like a sigh. "It's okay, I know that I'm dying. I'm sorry I made you say as much as you did."

Sei turned his attention back to his bowl. It was hard enough to choke the “food” down when it was warm, he couldn’t do it once it got cold. When he lifted the spoon out, however, it slipped from his weak grip, rolling off the bed and onto the floor. Much to his surprise, the _a_ unit bent over to retrieve the spoon. Sei thanked him and held out his hand for it but the _a_ unit placed it on the tray, pulling a new spoon out of his breast pocket along with a napkin. Sei watched silently as the _a_ unit wiped off his hand, stunned by what had to be the nicest thing anyone had ever done for him. Again he thanked him and again he held his hand out for the spoon, but the _a_ unit kept it beyond his reach. "Allow me." He wouldn't even know how to argue, so he placed his hands in his lap and nodded.

He expected it to be an unpleasant experience as most _a_ units hated dealing with him, but this one was very careful and patient with him. Sei took the opportunity to study him, interested in what made this _a_ unit so different from all the others. It wasn't like Toue to allow damaged product out and about. Even with the thousands that were surely walking around by now, Toue wouldn't let even one abnormality slide. His thoughts were interrupted by the spoon lightly tapping his lips. "You're almost done. Please finish." Sei blinked slowly and opened his mouth.

Once the bowl was empty, the _a_ unit removed the tray from Sei's lap and set it on the floor. "You haven't touched the water. Are you not able to reach it?" Sei shook his head with a sad smile. "I'm sorry, I can't." The _a_ unit stood and walked around the bed. "No need to be sorry..." It looked like he was going to say more but thought better of it. Keeping a hand cupped under the glass for support, he helped Sei take a drink, looking guilty as he watched him guzzle it.

There was a moment after that the _a_ unit just stood there, waiting for something. Sei tipped his head to the side and smiled at him. "Thank you for your help." That seemed to bring the _a_ unit back from wherever he was. He walked over and picked up the tray, placing the empty glass on it. "I will be back in a few minutes with more water." Sei nodded but the _a_ unit turned away too fast to see it. True to his word though, he returned shortly with a new glass. This time he slid the side table right up to the bed before setting it down.

Watching him do all of this, it occurred to Sei that his question from earlier had gone unanswered. The _a_ unit carried the chair outside the door and came back over to the bed. "Is the water within reach now?" Sei nodded and held his hand out towards the table to prove it. "Good. I'll check on you again once you've rested."

As he turned to leave, Sei chanced asking him again. "Will you tell me if it was you that I heard singing?" The _a_ unit stopped as he did before. With a sigh, he turned back to face Sei. "That wasn't me." His face was serious but his eyes couldn't lie. Sei decided not to call him on it. "I'm sorry, it's difficult for me to tell the _a_ units apart. There's nothing to differentiate one from another." The crystal pink of the _a_ units eyes darkened. Everything about him seemed to shift. Sei raised an eyebrow curiously. "I'm sorry if I offended you." The _a_ unit quickly turned to leave but before he opened the door, he looked over his shoulder. "My name is Clear, that is how I'm different." Then he left.


	2. Chapter 2

Sei opened his eyes slowly. He had once again successfully left the peace of sleep to return to this room. Sometimes the realization made him want to cry. He never did. Instead, he lay there quietly, waiting for someone to come and confirm he had made it through another nap. They always seemed to know when he woke up, though he doubted Toue felt it necessary to keep an eye on him.

He looked over at the door like he was hoping to see through it. Trying to picture a guard sitting just on the other side. There wasn't one of course. There never had been. Still, his mind insisted on putting one there. He became so lost in thought over it that it surprised him when the door opened and two _a_ units entered. If they were the same ones who had changed the sheets, Sei couldn't tell. They walked around the bed silently. One stood beside Sei while the other turned off the monitor. It was almost frightening to hear the soft beep of his heart stop so suddenly, though he had hardly been aware of the sound before that instant.

Sei remained still while one _a_ unit lifted his shirt and detached the leads from the sticky electrodes on his chest, winding them up and setting them on the monitor. As he wheeled the monitor over to the door, the other _a_ unit approached the bed and began peeling off the electrodes. Despite how deliberately slow he was being, he still managed to rip some skin off.

Once the task was complete, the _a_ unit yanked Sei's shirt messily back into place and moved to open the door for the other. As he did, he caught the _a_ unit that called himself Clear standing on the other side. His hand frozen in the air like he had been just about to knock. Sei smiled at the sight of him. "Hello again Clear." This made the two _a_ units sneer. Sei's smile faded a bit as he watched them walk past Clear snickering.

Sei sat up and held his hands out for the tray, placing it carefully in his lap while Clear brought in a chair from the hallway like he had done the time before. "I trust you can feed yourself this time?" Clear sat back in the chair and crossed his arms. Sei nodded with a smile and began spooning the sludge into his mouth. He got halfway through the bowl when he realized Clear hadn't spoken a word. He just sat and stared at the foot of the bed.

"Is something wrong Clear?" He laid the spoon down on the tray and folded his hands in his lap. Clear continued to look at the spot at the end of the bed while he answered. "Is it difficult for you to eat that?" Sei's eyes widened in surprise. It was a simple enough question, the "food" was atrocious, but he never imagined someone would care enough to ask him what he thought of it. He took a second to think before answering. "When it's cold, I find it difficult to eat but overall, I think I'm pretty used to it by now. I suppose it would be inedible to some." Clear nodded and Sei took up his spoon again to finish eating in silence.

"Place your glass on the tray, I will bring you a clean one." Sei did as he was told and Clear grabbed the tray and left the room. It took longer for him to come back than it did the last time. When he returned, he wordlessly sat the glass on the side table and made to leave. "Clear?" Sei's voice was soft but still Clear listened, turning back to face him. "Is something wrong?" Clear shook his head looking maybe a little uncomfortable. "You can't tell me?" Again Clear shook his head. Sei tipped his head and smiled at him. "Why not? Is it something bad?" Clear raised an eyebrow as his gaze became unfocused. He appeared to be wrestling with an answer. "Bad? I don't know."

Sei stared at him in fascination. He just witnessed a whole range of emotions run across the face of an _a_ unit. A thing that was never meant to feel. Yet this one seemed fearful, guilty, sad. He wondered if he was aware of all of this. When Clear's focus returned and he noticed Sei studying him, his face went blank. "I will be back later." He flung open the door and quickly exited the room before Sei could ask any more questions.

Sei stared after him, contemplating the door again. He had crossed that threshold a million times in his too short (too long?) life, but never got to remember it. The drugs were always kicking in just as they wheeled him out and he was always brought back before he woke up. He caught glimpses here and there and of course he had his ways with his power but he had never truly been outside. For the past year he had been monitored so closely he was limited even with his power. He didn't let it get him down of course. He made himself believe the world was like the ones he used to read about in his story books and not the one Toue owned. He lost himself in daydreams until a knock at the door scrambled his thoughts. Was it later already? Knowing immediately who it was, Sei put on a smile.

Clear came in wheeling a small, metal tub of water. Usually Sei would receive sponge baths, but when he was able to move on his own, this is how he would bathe. Clear helped him sit upright and swing his legs over the side of the bed. Sei watched him intently, lifting his arms for him so he could remove his shirt. He wanted to ask him about their earlier conversation, but a finger running over his chest stopped him. "You should have said something if you were bleeding." Sei looked down and saw that he was, in fact, bleeding. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize." He remembered earlier, the _a_ unit ripping the electrodes off. Clear shook his head and stood. "I'll get bandages."

When Clear left, Sei slid himself off the bed and attempted to steady himself on his feet. His knees felt like fluid but he kept himself upright long enough to get his pants down to his ankles. Carefully, he lifted one foot out and then the other. Leaning against the bed for support, Sei slowly made his way over to the tub. He got as close as he could using the bed, then took one hand and reached. Feeling pretty good about his grip, Sei slid a foot over. His step proved a bit too far, however, his knee caving under the weight when he shifted. He fell against the tub, hitting his head and elbow on the way down.

The room turned into a blurry mess that whirled around him. He shook his head to regain some focus. When his vision came back to him, he saw Clear running towards him. He was quickly lifted from the floor and set on the bed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to trouble you." Clear looked him over, frowning at a bruise that was already starting to form on his elbow. "You apologize too much, it's annoying." Clear placed a finger under his chin and lifted his face to look into his eyes. Sei didn't know what he was looking for exactly but he appeared to be satisfied by whatever he saw there. "You seem fine for the most part. Maybe this time I could help you?" Both of them found it odd that he would ask, so instead of waiting for an answer, Clear lifted him into his arms again.

Sei was gently lowered into the tub, the warm water instantly soothing his sore body. "Thank you Clear." When Clear took a seat next to the tub, Sei gave him a funny look and laughed. "You're going to watch me bathe?" Clear crossed his arms and turned around in the chair. "With as accident prone as you seem to be, it would be stupid not to. With my luck, you would slip under the water." Clear glanced over his shoulder at him and quickly looked away. Sei was speechless. Was that humor?

That was twice today that Clear stunned him into silence with moments that seemed almost human. It was far too interesting for Sei to let go. "Clear, are you a different model than the two that were in here earlier?" He leaned his head far back in the hopes of catching a glimpse of Clear's face. "I am." His answer was too short. Mechanical. Sei cleared his throat. "I ask because you look just like them, but I feel like you might have different eyes or voices?" Clear tensed up in the chair.

Sei sat upright when Clear turned around. The look he was getting made the water feel cold. He went back to bathing himself so he didn't have to face the glare anymore. "Am I wrong?" There was a sound like Clear was grinding his teeth. "Don't compare us." He didn't sound angry, it hardly even sounded like a demand. Sei couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. "Why not?"

Clear stared at him for a long second before breaking into a lopsided grin. "Are you trying to upset me?" Sei gave him an innocent look. "Have I upset you?" They stared at each other as if in challenge. Clear's smile faded slowly and was replaced with confusion. "It seems as though you may be trying." Something about how he said that made Sei feel suddenly guilty. "Really? Heh, I suppose I am." Sei smiled softly at him. "I'm sorry." Clear searched his face then let out a sigh. "Are you ready to get out now?"

Dried, bandaged and dressed, Sei was helped back into bed. Clear wheeled the tub out of the room and returned with a bowl of slop. Sei laughed as it was placed in his lap. "I feel like all I do is eat." Clear dragged the chair over to the side of the bed and sat down. "You only get two meals a day." Sei went very quiet like he wasn't even breathing and stared down into the bowl. It was a strange reaction. Clear leaned forward, looking carefully for the rise and fall of Sei's chest. "What's wrong?" He placed a hand on Sei's shoulder. It seemed to startle him. He flinched and went wide-eyed, then he sucked in a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Clear gave him a few minutes to recover before he dared to move again. "What happened?" He sat back down in the chair, eyeing Sei wearily. "I'm sorry." It was the only thing he offered. He picked up the spoon and began eating. By the time he was finished, he seemed back to normal. He handed the bowl to Clear and smiled his usual smile. "You're not going to tell me what that was about? I'm responsible for your health so if something is wrong, you need to tell me." Sei shook his head. "It's nothing to worry about, really." Clear didn't look satisfied with this answer so Sei made him an offer. "You tell me your secret and I'll tell you mine."

He was aware that he was once again poking at Clear. Even he didn't understand why he felt the need to do it. It just seemed like there was something about Clear that was worth knowing. "Another game?" Just when Sei thought he wasn't going to play along, Clear waved his hand, urging him to talk. "I didn't mean to worry you. It really was nothing. I don't like to think of time and I didn't realize how much of it I lost waiting for the next meal to come. I don't even know what I do in between your visits." Sei looked up at the spot on the wall where the clock used to be. Having it removed was the only request he had ever made. He didn't want to be anymore aware of the time passing and it was so loud being the only noise in the room. The sound used to drive him crazy, seeming to get louder with every tick, tick, tick.

Clear remained quiet for a while after Sei stopped talking. His face gave nothing away. Just when he thought he had shared his fears for nothing, Clear let out a breath. His eyes bore into Sei like he was trying to hold him there with his gaze. Like he was afraid if he looked away, Sei might make a run for it. It occurred to him then that Clear was truly nervous to share what he was about to. Sei found himself leaning forward in anticipation. After what felt like forever, Clear seemed to settle something for himself.

"There is someone else that I am responsible for." He stopped to let the information sink in. Sei nodded for him to continue. "They haven't been eating and I don't know why. I thought maybe it was the food." Sei waited to see if he had more to say. He didn't. It was a little unsatisfying but he was happy to have gotten anything at all. "Why not just ask them?" Clear shook his head. "He doesn't speak." He made a face like he didn't know how to feel about that. Sei raised an eyebrow. "He?" Clear didn't respond. The conversation was at risk of becoming one-sided again. Sei back peddled. "Maybe they aren't feeling well."

There was something Clear wasn't saying. It was so thick in the air between them they could hardly look at each other. Sei hadn't been wrong about him. He wasn't like the others. There was a spark of humanity in this _a_ unit. He was watching him grapple with it now. Sei pitied him. "If there is something you would like to say, it's okay to do so. You can tell me anything." Clear looked like he really wanted to believe that, so he sat upright in his chair, wiped his face free of emotion and looked Sei dead in the eye.

"Aoba is in my care."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this took a lot longer than it was supposed to. Sorry about that. The next chapter will be done sooner. It will also be the last I think.

They sat staring at each other until it was almost intolerable. There had been no reaction to his confession, though he couldn't honestly say what he thought Sei's reaction should be. The silence stretched between them making Clear shift nervously in his chair. Sei looked like he was expecting to hear more. Clear finally couldn't take it anymore, he leaned forward with his hands on his knees. "Are you not surprised?" They both seemed shocked by Clear's reaction. Completely thrown off by the sudden outburst of emotion. When Sei spoke, his voice was soft, like he suddenly understood something about Clear. "It's okay Clear, you haven't been keeping secrets from me." Sei put a finger next to his eye and tapped twice. "I've known for a while that he was here."

Clear blinked slowly while he processed this, he then leaned back in the chair and folded his arms across his chest. "You've gotten me to say what you wanted." Sei nodded. "I know, I'm sorry." His voice was placating. "Thank you, Clear." Clear said nothing in return. He was lost in everything that had transpired. He didn't know why he had confided in Sei or why he felt the way he did while doing it. Almost as if he was afraid of what Sei would think and that didn't make sense to him.

Clear stood suddenly. He needed to get out of the room. After gathering the tray, he looked up at Sei to inform him he would be back later, but the look on his face made him freeze. "What's wrong?" Sei shrugged, seeming unsure of how to say what he wanted. "I don't know. I guess I just ... I would like to know him." Clear turned his back to him. "If you're asking, the answer is no." As he was walking to the door, he expected Sei to push him on the matter, but he didn't. In fact, he didn't say anything. Clear left the room without another word passing between them.

Once in the hallway, Clear felt the weight of what he'd done. Toue had been perfectly clear that he was not to mention Aoba. He couldn't imagine Sei would be able to do anything with that information. He had even said that he had known for a while already. Still, he had to tell Toue that he slipped up. With that thought in mind, Clear took care of the tray and made his way to Toue.

As much as Clear hated being here, the doors to Toue's office had always been one of his favorite things to look at in the tower. They were beautiful and ornate and they stood in stark contrast to the rest of the building's uniform interior. Looking at them gave Clear a weird feeling in his chest that he couldn't understand. Like a pleasant memory he couldn't quite remember was fluttering around in the place his heart would be if he had one. He shook his head and knocked on the door, letting himself in before he could think anymore about it.

Immediately upon entering he noticed Toue was sitting behind his desk with his fingers laced together. A smile on his face that said he was expecting him. Clear took a couple steps from the door and stopped. He had never ventured too far into this room. He had a feeling it was dangerous but he forgot why. Toue always seemed to pick up on this and it always seemed to amuse him. 

Clear looked at the desk instead of Toue and quickly got on with why he was there. He emitted a few details but in short, he informed Toue that Sei had admitted to knowing Aoba had been brought to the tower and he had admitted that Aoba was in his care. As Clear talked, Toue stood up from his chair and walked around his desk, leaning himself against it. His smile was back the instant Clear finished. "Might I ask why you chose to share this information with me?" Clear gave him a suspicious look and he feigned hurt. "Come now Clear, I'm fascinated by you is all." 

Toue was testing him, he knew it but he had no choice but to answer. "Surely I'm not the only one of your lackeys to take responsibility for a mistake?" This made Toue laugh. "The others wouldn't have made any. Mistakes are human." It hit Clear in that instant that everything had been a test. Tending to Sei had been a test and he had failed. The shock must have shown on his face because Toue made an effort to stifle his amusement some. "No need to worry. Though, I'm curious, did Sei have anything to say about what you shared with him?" Clear collected himself, allowing nothing but his distaste for the man in front of him to show. "He simply said he wished to know him."

Toue rubbed his chin with a finger as he thought. He pushed himself off of his desk and walked back around to his chair. "He wants to know Aoba huh?" He slowly lowered himself into the chair and scooted it up to the desk. "Sure, it should be interesting." Clear looked confused. "Take him to see Aoba if it's what he wants. If you will allow it of course." Before he could argue, Toue waved his hand at him, dismissing him.

For a while after his conversation with Toue, Clear walked aimlessly around the tower. Usually he would spend this time with Aoba but he really needed the space to think. He didn't care if Sei wanted to see Aoba, so why did he feel so conflicted about it? Sei had been pressing reactions out of him since they met. Testing him like Toue was. Everyone was testing him. He played all of their interactions over in his head. Every time Sei set him up he fell for it. He shared too much. Expressed too much. At this rate, Toue would write him off as a failure and scrap him. Then he couldn't be with Aoba. He wouldn't allow it. He will just have to do as Toue says for now. If he thinks Sei meeting Aoba will be interesting, then he would take Sei to meet him.

When he brought Sei his food later that day, he noticed he was very quiet and slow-moving. It had been a pretty lively day compared to what he was used to, maybe he was just tired. He offered to help him eat and Sei just put the spoon down on the tray for him to pick up. It was odd. He decided to let him eat in peace. He would tell him once he had finished.

After removing the tray from Sei's lap and placing it on the floor next to the chair, Clear took a deep breath. His nerves must have been pretty obvious because Sei was looking at him strangely. "What is it Clear?" Sei leaned forward a bit. It looked like it took a lot of energy for him to do so. Clear began wringing his hands in his lap. "If I told you I could take you to see Aoba, would that be something you would want?" Sei gasped and placed a hand to his chest. His excitement made Clear feel terrible. "I would, yes, please." Clear stood from the chair. "I could take you now if you want." Sei nodded.

Clear brought a wheelchair into the room and helped Sei settle into it. As they headed to Aoba, Clear felt the need to warn Sei about something. He didn't know why though. He did tell him that he wasn't allowing him to enter Aoba's room, he could see him through the bars. He found it off that Sei didn't ask about that. As they reached the hall leading to Aoba's room, both of them fell silent. Aoba was sitting by the bars, gripping on to them tightly. Clear often found him this way. He wheeled Sei up to him and locked the wheels before taking a step back.

For a very long couple of minutes, Sei just sat there and stared at Aoba. There wasn't much left of him. He was paler now and his skin was pulled tight over his bones. His hair had become dull and thin and laid about his shoulders like straw. The only hint of life was a thin line of drool running down his chin. Sei reached up slowly as if he worried he might frighten Aoba if he moved too fast. He pulled his sleeve over his hand and gently wiped away the drool. He then tucked Aoba's hair behind his ears to get it out of his face. He noticed out of the corner of his eye that Clear twitched with every touch as if in jealousy. Sei carefully removed one of Aoba's hands from a bar one finger at a time and held it in his. 

He didn't do anything but stare at him for the next few minutes feeling completely and utterly defeated. Toue was running the world outside with a cheap knock-off of their power. A power that he had been made to believe was great. But as he sat there holding his twin's bony, porcelain hand Sei had to wonder, where was all their power? Which of these two empty shells possessed the world-dominating ability? Sei didn't even have the strength to walk here on his own. 

"Take me back to my room now please." His voice had come so suddenly, Clear almost jumped. Sei gently wrapped Aoba's hand back around the bar as it was before, then sat back in the wheelchair and stared into his lap. Clear took him back to his room as he asked. He lifted Sei into his bed, noting that Sei hadn't looked at him since they left Aoba. "I'm tired, please leave me now." Confused and with no other reason to stay, Clear left.

The next day, Sei didn't say a word when Clear brought him his meal. Didn't even look in his direction. He just looked sad as he chewed and when he was done and the tray was moved, he lay down facing away from him. When Clear came back the second time he noticed Sei hadn't moved from this position. Things continued on this way for the next few days with Sei eating less and less each time. Not knowing what to do, Clear decided he needed to go back to Toue.

This time he didn't stop to admire the doors. He wasn't even sure he knocked before barging in. Toue looked surprised, but not too surprised. "Hello again Clear. I wasn't expecting another visit from you so soon." He stared at Clear with his usual smile, waiting patiently for an explanation. Clear shifted from one foot to the other and back. "I believe Sei is ill and that it is my fault." Toue's smile widened as he tipped his head curiously. "Why? What have you done?" Clear stood there, silent and confused, before shrugging his shoulders. "I don't know really." Toue laughed at this and got up from his chair. "Curious. Well then, that being the case, maybe you should not be permitted to see him anymore. I'll find someone else to tend to him." Clear made to argue but he couldn't. "Tomorrow, please. I will finish out the day." Toue found this amusing but he said nothing about it as Clear left.

Clear went almost directly to Sei after his meeting with Toue. He had to sit Sei up in bed and feed him as he had stopped doing these things for himself. Clear was happy to do it though. He had to do it for Aoba as well. When Sei was no longer opening his mouth for the spoon, Clear set the tray aside. He leaned forward and put a hand on the bed like he was hoping this would get Sei's attention, but he didn't move. "This will be the last time I come here. Toue will be sending someone else to tend to you since you aren't eating for me." He paused in case Sei wanted to say something. He didn't. Clear continued. "If you tell me what is wrong, I can fix it." Again he paused. Again Sei said nothing. "Then I can continue to care for you." He realized he was begging for a reaction he wasn't going to get. With a sigh he grabbed the tray and left.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter! I wrestled with this chapter a little bit. Feels like a weird ending but I'm happy to move on from this story.  
> Thank you all for reading and to everyone who left kudos and comments.

It had been a few weeks since Clear had seen Sei and he hardly crossed his mind anymore. He was far too busy in his quest to make Aoba perfect to spare a thought to anything else. With his eyes, legs and arms gone, all that was left was his voice. Clear had been waiting patiently for Toue's permission to do away with Aoba's vocal chords and, to his delight, he had been given the go-ahead the day before. He wanted to see to it immediately but it would be his last chance to hear Aoba's voice, so he spent the rest of the day committing it to memory. 

So, today was the day.

He hummed happily as he walked. Aoba was finally going to be just as he wanted him to be. Just when he thought nothing could ruin his good mood, he noticed an a unit approaching him. He wanted nothing more than to ignore him and continue walking, but he stopped in front of him, blocking his way. Clear sighed in irritation. "Is there something I can help you with?" The a unit smirked at him. "Toue sent me to find you. You're being ordered to Sei's room, now."

Clear raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Now? For what reason?" This made the a unit laugh. "What other reason do you need other than Toue ordered you to?" He laughed again when Clear didn't answer. "Sei has been asking for you, you are to go now because he will probably be dead within the hour."

Clear's arm twitched, like his body wanted to take a swing at the mirror image in front of him. Instead he placed two fingers at his temple and pressed. "I find it odd that Toue would care so suddenly." Clear gasped when he realized Sei had said the same thing to him word for word. The a unit didn't seem fazed, instead he just shrugged. "He said it would be interesting." Clear quickly turned away, wanting to be done with the conversation. "He seems to find everything interesting." 

As he walked, Clear wondered what Sei wanted with him. When he had left him, he was refusing to talk to him. Thinking back, Clear couldn't figure out what had happened. His last days with Sei had been filled with an anxiety he couldn't understand. He shook his head as if he were trying to shake the thoughts from his mind. Standing in front of Sei's door, he declared all of it ridiculous and vowed to make this as quick as possible. Aoba was waiting for him.

He knocked on the door and let himself in. As he crossed the room, he took in Sei's form. It was not as he remembered it. He had lost a lot of weight, his face looking sunken in, his hands appearing skeletal. His eyes, which had always been filled with a bright curiosity, had become so dull they were practically colorless. An odd feeling spread through Clear's chest as he took a seat next to the bed and when Sei smiled at him, that feeling got caught in Clear's throat. He swallowed against it and took a deep breath. "You have been asking for me?"

Sei nodded and opened his mouth to speak but his voice just squeaked out of him. He frowned, cleared his throat and tried again. "Thank you for coming Clear. I'm sorry to have bothered you." His voice was so quiet, Clear found himself leaning closer to him. "There are some things I have really wanted to say to you. I don't know that I will get another chance. Will you listen?" Clear nodded.

Sei closed his eyes for a second before looking back over at Clear. "I know your time with me must have been unpleasant, but I wanted you to know that your presence was a comfort to me." Clear remained quiet and didn't let any emotion show on his face. Sei didn't seem bothered by this as he continued. "It meant so much to me that you allowed me to see Aoba." Clear squirmed uncomfortably in the chair. "I have seen him before he was brought here. What he's become frightens and angers me. Though I want you to know I've never thought you were evil." Tears were forming in his eyes now as he talked. "I'm sad because you probably can't understand."

Clear shook his head. Sei laughed softly and closed his eyes. "That's fine. Maybe that's for the best." He went silent, longer than Clear could stand. He reached out and touched his hand. Sei opened his eyes at the contact and it took everything Clear had not to sigh in relief. He wiped a tear from Sei's cheek with the back of his hand and leaned back in the chair. It didn't seem like Sei had anything more to tell him and he certainly had better things to do but, for some reason, he didn't want to leave.

Sei lifted a hand, slow and weak, and ran it through Clear's hair and down his cheek. Clear caught it as it fell limp and placed it gently on Sei's stomach. This felt familiar to him. Like this had happened before in a time he wasn't sure existed. Holding a limp hand and watching someone fade into sleep. He clung to Sei's hand as if holding onto him would help him hold on to the memory. 

"You know, I knew you were the one who was singing that day." Sei sighed like it was tiring to talk. "I would really like to hear you sing again." Clear noticed he was squeezing Sei's hand quite hard now. He released him and sat back in the chair. "No." Clear seemed more hurt by his answer than Sei who simply accepted it with a smile.

Neither of them said anything for quite some time and it once again crossed Clear's mind that he no longer needed to stay. Sei's eyelids drooped as his blinking became slower and slower. Finally, he just let his eyes slide shut. "Clear... I'm very tired." Clear placed a hand on the bed, feeling a need to be closer to Sei in that moment. "You can leave, I know you probably want to." Clear didn't, in fact, he scooted the chair right up to the bed and lay his arm alongside Sei's body. 

Time slipped by while Clear sat in silence, watching the slow rise and fall of Sei's chest. When it stopped, he simply stood and left the room. 

It felt like it took forever to get to Aoba, and once there, Clear couldn't remember the walk. He sat on the edge of the bed and stared down at Aoba. Sei had said he had seen Aoba once before he was brought here and what he looked like now frightened him. What did he mean by that? That he didn't think Clear was evil. What had he done that was evil? This was still Aoba. He looked different of course, close to perfect, but it was still the same beautiful Aoba. He flinches like Aoba always has. He shivers like Aoba always has. Clear felt the need to prove to himself that Sei was wrong.

He reached out a hand and ran his fingers through the dry, blue mat atop Aoba's head. He was so sure it would produce the normal reaction, but there was no shiver from him. Clear grabbed his shoulder and yanked hard, expecting Aoba's usual flinch at the rough treatment. Instead he just fell against Clear like dead weight. Clear sighed in irritation as he lifted Aoba into his arms. This was silly, he wanted a doll, and dolls don't need to move. Sei wasn't going to deter him from what he had been waiting for.

Clear carried him into the room he had set aside just for this reason. The room in which he made Aoba perfect. Just for Aoba, Clear had made the room look a little different from all the other "operating" rooms he had been in. The time they spent here was special for Clear. He wanted it to be special for Aoba too. Gently Clear laid him down on the steel table. His chest knotting in what he could only assume was excitement.

He bent down and placed a kiss on Aoba's forehead. When he straightened up, he noticed droplets in Aoba's hair. Then another fell onto Aoba's cheek. Clear touched his face and looked at his hands to see that his fingers were wet. "I'm... crying?" He laid a hand down on the table and drew a shaky breath. Aoba rolled his head to face Clear and parted his lips slightly, as if to ask if he was okay.

It felt like there was something screaming in Clear's mind. He knew it was important, he just couldn't make sense of it. Something was wrong with Aoba. Clear ran his eyes down his body. Everything was wrong with Aoba. This isn't what Clear wanted. He just wanted to be like Aoba. He just wanted Aoba to be like him. He had gone about it all wrong. He was evil and there was nothing left of the only two people who could forgive him.

Crawling up onto the table, Clear lay his head on Aoba's shoulder and curled his body around him. He imagined Aoba patting his head and telling him everything was okay. He thinks that might have happened once. 

He ran a finger softly over the cloth covering Aoba's eyes. Tears fell down his cheeks freely as he tried to understand what brought them here. 

"Hey... Aoba."


End file.
